Here are some of the titles I thought of for this post.
‘It’s not you, it’s me.’
‘Where to from here?’
‘Changes changes everywhere’
All of them seemed appropriate. Everything seems to be shifting weight around here. Rolling from the then and moving to the new.
My only problem is that I was really rather happy with the old…and as with most things in my life. I’m rather intimidated by the new.
I’ve been a bit absent from here of late because I’ve been so busy everywhere else.
The Little Bush Princess had a final class concert for her little pre-school class. It was so lovely and so heart wrenching at the same time.
Counting down the days until there would be no more turns on the flying fox.
The last ballet class for the year.
The last day in year three for The Golden Child and Presentation Day that made me cry.
Then the Pre School’s Christmas Party.
On 15th August 2000 I stopped working fulltime a few weeks before our little boy was born. I haven’t returned to the workforce in any real way since then. A bit here and a bit there but nothing much. Now in six weeks time my last little lamb heads off to school. I feel a sense of almost mourning settling over me. There’s a lump in my throat that I can’t hide in my voice any more. It sounds silly, shallow and a bit wrong but I feel like my ‘reason for being’ is running out…shallow I know.
I know change must happen.
I just wish I could stall it for a little while longer.
Just a little while.
I’m not ready yet.